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Easter is a lovely holiday – the simplicity of Spring wrapped up in a meal that features some very flavorful foods – asparagus, lemon, artichokes, feta, lamb, chocolate bunnies, marshmallow chicks, jelly beans and the mac daddy of them all Cadbury Creme Eggs. Yep, along with Halloween, Easter is yet another huge out of control and totally ridiculous candy holiday.
3 words. Cadbury Creme Eggs
I know folks who go completely insane over Cadbury Creme Eggs. Looking online they are not alone as there are websites dedicated to using them as an ingredient! Just thinking about eating one makes me feel sick. I do believe I would probably die if I ate one after almost sixteen years without any real candy. I carefully guard and preserve the threat of dumping syndrome and do everything possible to keep it intact as it helps me. The fact is, I don’t really know if I would get sick if I wolfed down three ‘eggs’ but I assume with such unwavering belief that I don’t even consider it.
If I didn’t have potential for feeling ill, why wouldn’t I go back to eating in the manner that got me here in the first place. I’ve always been a little baffled by people who think they are lucky that they ‘don’t dump’ on sugar and I wonder how ‘sleevers’ manage with only restriction. (definitely judging, but also just talking out loud, as they certainly do not have as great potential for having a tooth fall out of their head as I do… if they just take vitamins.)
I BOUGHT THESE AND LOOK WHAT HAPPENED
THIS WILL BE A SHOCK TO SOME OF YOU. As you bought a bag of Creme Eggs, you would have handled them at least 8 times from shelf to mouth and at any point could have pulled the plug on your self destruction, yet did not. If you buy them? You will eat them! The key is to NOT buy them. Same premise as ‘if you do not go to McDonalds, you will not eat a cheeseburger’. I have NO WAY to eat a McDonalds cheeseburger IF I do not go to McDonalds. I cannot eat the crispy fried chicken skin from Popeyes Fried Chicken, if I do not go to Popeyes and buy it. Feel the common thread with this line of thinking? Here’s another one SHAMROCK SHAKES: People love these things but if you don’t turn into the parking lot of McDonalds, you can’t drink one.
BUT I HAVE KIDS and it’s Easter.
Using your innocent children as an excuse to buy Easter basket candy is not fair nor does it further your weight loss or health ambitions. Do kids really need Easter baskets anymore? If you attend church you get this part as there are simply other parts of the story to focus on. If you do not: Isn’t the average six year old too smart to believe that a giant rabbit leaves a basket of candy in the middle of the night for them? This is similar to the implosion of Mickey Mouse. We were idiot children who were mesmerized by such wonder. We didn’t know it was a guy in a plush acrylic suite, but not the wee ones of today with iPads and iPhones. They know better and they don’t need an Easter Basket. Really, you know they don’t.
Here is the answer
Overdose on sugar free. ONE TIME. You will never do it again. Trust me. Pick up a package of sugar free PEEPS, a tray of sugar free Jelly Bellies, a bag of Russell Stover Sugar Free Coconut Eggs, and a bag of sugar free Werther’s Caramels. Have a few of each and be done with it. DO NOT STRAY FAR FROM YOUR BATHROOM and DO NOT DO THIS AT WORK or on a day when you must drive anywhere. Cured!
Hansel & Gretel were warned
Fairy tales teach us to not go where you know the danger lives. I have avoided the witch who lives in the ‘Gingerbread House’ for many years now as I stay out of the woods. Of course it is a Choice as I always give myself Permission, but I Choose to not go there.
We all know what is good and what is bad. Be true to yourself and keep the control in your hands rather than looking for reasons to eat foods you really don’t want to eat. We are all adults and we know this stuff. Think your way through it.
Stop the slide early on
When in the grocery store standing and staring at the Foil Covered Chocolate Eggs, SAY NO. Say it out loud and put them back. It is better than making excuses and later feeling guilty that you ate them. Bargain with yourself to wander to the sugar free chocolate and talk yourself into throwing the sugar free Russell Stover Coconut Eggs into the cart. It is a better deal you will be much happier with in the long run.
Ummm… and YES, I am completely aware that sugar alcohols in sugar free chocolate are fairly explosive in nature. I don’t give it a thought while eating my first or second foil wrapped Coconut Egg. It does move up in priority when I am eating the third one while looking at the time in which I have gobbled them up, it gives me a reality check. I actually weigh the pro’s and con’s of eating yet another versus how badly I do not wish to explode six hours later. I have clearly established that three is my limit per 24 hour period and there are five in a package. Got to know where where the woods begin in order to avoid crossing into them.
Yep, post op life is one grand negotiation but then again, that is life in general. Have a wonderful and reverent Easter with your loved ones. Stay out of the woods! Boom.