After Shannon and I downed our Kir Royal’s at Parasol Down we wobbled as we hung on and rode up the long curved escalator to the main floor and sped off to meet Ty, Eric and his wife at Botero restaurant at Encore.

When we arrived we were out of breath but acted calm cool and collected. Hey, sure we would LOVE a drink – lol. Why we will have Kir Royales. Eric is our new BE Blogger – a good friend who has done an amazing job with his RNY – losing 658 pounds and getting to goal in like 62 days.

Just kidding, Eric lost 125 pounds and is down to a slim and fit 185 pounds. MEN GET TO GOAL FAST LADIES, GET OVER IT. Eric is smart, funny, loves to cook, and is married to Jana, a tall blonde who is incredibly engaging, with a gorgeous smile and laugh. Oh, Jana buys the parsley to garnish Eric’s food as she understands marketing as Eric simply cooks great tasting food to eat.

We are surrounded in the restaurant Botero by the art of the namesake artist. Botero is the Colombian artist who interprets everything in his world in a different proportion many interpret as fat. It’s like living in a bizarro Obese world. The children, the cats and dogs, are all in the same proportion as well. There is a lot of dancing by the large people in Botero paintings.

I surmise Fernando Botero may be an admirer of larger women, a chubby chaser of sorts, not that there is anything wrong with that. As my friend and colleague Shannon Watts has already so delicately pointed out, while all the paintings and sculptures in this exquisite restaurant are grandly obese – the hostesses, bartenders, and wait staff at Botero – not so much. They must go out of their way to hire the least Botero-like people in existence. We follow the tall thin beautiful hostess to our table and I am seated so when I look to the right, all I see is a HUGE thigh and half of the largest butt cheek. It could be my own former reflection if I were naked and raised my left arm.

I cant help but be thankful we were not seated directly behind the giant butt, with view of the crack. Of course Shannon felt inclined to walk around the large sculpture to photograph the ample derriere. Shannon is a comedienne.

Dinner is delicious. Shannon and I shared an appetizer of Ahi Tuna and an entree of perfectly medium rare Rack of Lamb.

Eric and Jana shared appetizer of Heirloom Tomato and Buffalo Mozzarella Salad and entree of a Pepper Crusted Grilled Ribeye Steak

Ty a Caesar Salad with Frico and the Ahi Tuna appetizer. Our server was thrilled upon realizing our table would not be the normal five hundred dollar check. Such is bariatric life.

Eric nearly passed out when I ordered a Banana Bread Pudding with banana ice cream. YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO EAT THAT? Oh silly Eric of one year post op, no we are certainly NOT going to eat it, we are going to savor a tiny bite then pass it off to Ty who waits with spoon poised. It’s the dealio.

While we were enjoying our dessert a very oddly muscular woman passed our table en route to the Ladies Room. Problem is, she ain’t no lady. She is a man with an adams apple, broad shoulders, a long black curly wig, a mini skirt and stilettos. It’s Vegas baby! Of course Shannon leaped to her feet and ran to the rest room to check it out – she is from Mayberry North Carolina. However, by the time she blasted through the door of the Ladies room she literally ran into our slightly masculine friend and was too close to assess the scenario.

Back to the Banana Bread Pudding… as our evening comes to an end.